Nervous and embarassed

[justwant2smile]

I have not been to the dentist in 16 yrs. I am missing 2 molars, one is on the way out and I have 2 teeth that are cracked in half so I no longer smile.
My fear comes from 2 things, I had an extremely violent husband who in his fits of rage always went for my face, thus the resulting in missing some teeth.
The other experience was at 16 my dentist felt I should have my wisdom teeth extracted, even though they had not come out. All I was given was novacain and I felt them cutting the gum, breaking the teeth and pulling them out, all 4 in one visit. I was crying and teeling them I was in severe paid but they did nothing, I still shudder at the thought.
I did have a wonderful dentist who was kind and replaced 4 teeth that were severely damaged by a blow to my mouth from my ex, unfortunately he passed away and I have never been to a dentist since.
I have bitten the bullet and made an appointment for tomorrow morning but I am scared to death. When the receptionist asked when my last dental visit was there was a long pause when I told her 16 years.
I am a single mom who just gets by and I am afraid that I wont be able to afford what needs to be done. And I am terrified that I will end up with a bad dentist. I hope getting this off my chest will help me feel a little better about my visit in the morning.

[letsconnect]

Hi there ,

I don't know when exactly you wrote this, so I don't know if you have already been or not. I'm so sorry to hear about your horrible experiences in the past . I really hope the dentist you went to see/are going to see today will turn out kind and caring. In case s/he isn't, I would strongly urge you to look around for someone else who IS.

Please let us know how you got on. And in case you haven't left yet - BEST OF LUCK !!!

[Nicole]

Please don't be afraid to go see the dentist due to your condition. They are there to help and if you find a good dentist they won't judge you for the condition your teeth are in. I was scared to go too because mine were in such bad shape as well. My dentist pulled me aside and said that he wanted to help me but I have to learn to trust him first. (I wouldn't even open my mouth!) When I finally got up enough gumption I showed him what was going on and he said Okay lets get you in here and get you better. They cried with me when I was unable to smile and they cried with me when I could smile for the first time in years.
Many people come in and need major work after a long spell of no treatment. More than you realize. I was one of them too! I hadn't been for 13 years due to lack of finances to go and neglect from parents...
There are also programs out there that deal with your situation. If you contact a local womens shelter they may have a dentist who offers free services to rebuild a smile due to breakage from abusive past relationships.
My dentist is part of this group here in Ohio and I have seen lives completely changed...
I wish you the best.

Nicole

[justwant2smile]

I went and I will say that the Hygenist was wonderful. He put me at ease and had a great chairside manner.
I was not thrilled with the dentist. When I told her about my fears her response to all of them were "oh". She must be just out of school and really didnt have much personality to her.
I was happy to hear the the owner of the practice would be doing the work, the receptionist said that since he had more experience" he would be doing it. I have to go back next thursday for a 3 hr session. This will include a half of a deep cleaning and 1 root canal.
I need 9 crowns, 3 root canals, 2-3 extractions and a deep pocket book as it it I need to totally cut my budget way back. Just for the rest of this year it will be 2k out of pocket and 5 k next year. This is with my 2 k max for my dental insurance, and does not include any specialists they may send me to.
They really want me to do implants
I really cant afford them at about 1k a tooth so I guess I will get a bridge for now and maybe later I can afford to do implants.
What is a good way to tell the desntist I dont want to work with his new associate?? I really dont feel that she understands my fears and it was really like talking to a rock with her.

[letsconnect]

Wow - that's fantastic !!! Congratulations - great to hear you had a good experience with the hygienist !!

Regarding the best way to tell the dentist (did you meet him, BTW?) you don't want to work with his associate - I'd say he'd probably be quite flattered if you told him you feel much more comfortable with him and ask him could he treat you . That would be my guess, anyway...

WELL DONE